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My streaming brethren,saint sebastian eroticism the Quibissance is upon us!

After months of unbelievable press releases and baffling marketing maneuvers, Quibi — the "quick bites" streaming service optimized for mobile content — has launched. Starting today, streamers can consume more than 50 new Quibi shows in vertical and horizontal formats for anywhere between 5 to 10 minutes a pop. If you subscribe before the end of April, you'll get 90 days free. After that, it'll cost you $4.99 per month with ads or $7.99 per month ad-free.

To help you prioritize your binge, we've combed through Quibi's entire launch day catalogue. There's the predictable, like Quibi's reboots of Punk'd and Singled Out. There's the heartwarming, like Thanks a Million and I Promise. There's the educational, like Fierce Queens and Shape of Pasta.And finally, there is the bizarre, like the hysterical Gayme Showand whatever Nikki Fre$h is.

But we've saved the best of the best (and the most entertainingly weird) for last. Here are the first nine shows you should be checking out on Quibi. All told, it'll take you just over an hour to watch an episode each of all nine series. So sit back, relax, and Quibi like you've never Quibi'd before.

9. Memory Hole

You are now entering the Memory Hole. Credit: quibi

In Memory Hole,host Will Arnett and his mysterious robot-voiced companion transport viewers back to pop culture's most painful memories. From the worst half-time show in history to the less flattering corners of martial arts appreciation, each episode offers enough third-hand embarrassment to make anyone (and anything) feel good about themselves. It's laugh out loud funny with just a pinch of anti-nostalgia. Maybe now is...better?

How to watch: Memory Hole is now streaming on Quibi.

8. Most Dangerous Game

Liam, no!! Credit: quibi

This modern spin on Richard Connell's short story of the same name has Liam Hemsworth running for his life. Playing a young man desperate to pay for his cancer treatment (not to mention the security of his wife and unborn child), Hemsworth flees the pursuit of wealthy hunters across New York City in the fight for his life. A killer co-starring performance by Christoph Waltz turns this clichéd narrative into a solid serial worth your repeat attention.

How to watch: Most Dangerous Game is now streaming on Quibi.

7. Murder House Flip

From, and I quote, "morbid to marvelous." Credit: quibi

If there's any title on this list I still can't believe exists, it's Murder House Flip. Join home renovation experts Mikel Welch and Joelle Uzyel as they travel to residences with dark pasts in an effort to revamp former scenes of the crime into welcoming homes. Sure, the bodies in the backyard may be long gone, but the outdated fixtures and appliances remain. Watch these in-over-their-heads heroes take projects from, and I quote, "morbid to marvelous."

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How to watch: Murder House Flip is now streaming on Quibi.

6. Dishmantled

God bless Tituss Burgess. Credit: quibi

Celebrate Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidtstar Tituss Burgess's chance to blow shit up by watching him do it. A delightful blend of Bon Appétit's "Reverse Engineering" and Jogwheel's "Is It A Good Idea To Microwave This?", Dishmantled tasks chefs with recreating dishes they can only taste — off the floor, off their clothing, and off their face after it's blasted at them through a high-powered canon. Featuring guest judging by Dan Levy, Jane Krakowski, Roy Choi, and more, this is the perfect cooking show. Not for like any specific time. It's the perfect cooking show.

How to watch: Dishmantled is now streaming on Quibi.

5. Chrissy's Court

The honorable judge(?) Chrissy Teigen Credit: quibi

Turns out, anyone can have their own legally binding court show! In the aptly named Chrissy's Court, TV presenter and Twitter superstar Chrissy Teigen mediates tense disputes between boyfriends with bones to pick, DJs in need of new equipment, and so much more. With Teigen's mom serving as "bailiff" and husband John Legend appearing as an expert witness, this 12-episode order of mayhem is a great pick for fans of drama, chaos, and well-accessorized robes.

How to watch: Chrissy's Court is now streaming on Quibi.

4. You Ain't Got These

"Most people are mortals, and they want to feel like gods." Credit: quibi

With engaging editing, smart interviews, and fascinating subject matter, Lena Waithe's You Ain't Got These digs into the ins and outs of sneaker culture with unbridled tenacity. Analyzing social hierarchy, the importance of fashion symbolism, and what it means to bond over a shared interest, this 12-part docuseries is a must watch for the informed — whether you love sneakers or not.

How to watch: You Ain't Got These is now streaming on Quibi.

3. NightGowns

It's raining queens, kings, and drag legends. Credit: quibi

RuPaul's Drag Race Season 9 winner Sasha Velour makes her executive producing debut in the exquisite NightGowns. Capturing the transformative world of performance through Velour's long-running drag revue, this eight-part docuseries depicts some of the most inclusive and celebratory work in the business. Not only does each episode introduce viewers to a new performer, but the series also provides essential representation of the art form as a whole to mainstream audiences.

SEE ALSO: Sasha Velour is making the world a prouder place, one lip-sync at a time

How to watch: NightGowns is now streaming on Quibi.

2. Flipped

It's Flip It and Gone with Cricket and Jann!! Credit: quibi

The only problem with Flipped is that I want more of it. Starring Will Forte and Kaitlin Olson as a delusional couple dreaming of their own home renovation show, this bite-sized comedy is perfectly paced and whip-smart. Whether it's a children's musical rendition of the Triangle Shirtwaist Factory fire or a grown woman just having zero understanding of how video editing works, the antics of DIY artists Jann and Cricket guarantee giggles — if not a long, successful career in home improvement.

How to watch: Flipped is now streaming on Quibi.

1. When the Streetlights Go On

Who killed Chrissy Monroe? Credit: quibi

Somewhere between Twin Peaksand Stranger Things, When the Streetlights Go Onis without question the crowning jewel of Quibi's launch day. When the grisly murders of a teen girl (Kristine Froseth) and her high school teacher (Mark Duplass) shake a small town, the boy who found their bodies (Chosen Jacobs) goes on a mission to uncover the meaning behind the mystery. Hauntingly shot and beautifully scripted, this series will have you hooked in seconds.

How to watch: When the Streetlights Go On is now streaming on Quibi.